What do you look for in a suitor?
I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy the company of humble globetrotting polymaths, but primarily I’ve found my litmus test for friends to be how seriously you take yourself. What matters the most to me is that you are kind and have integrity.
what is your ideal date?
I love to dance and find live music to be one of the most uniquely erotic experiences. My perfect date begins with making eyes at each other over dinner, a stroll, or show before retiring to somewhere private, preferably a location with scented candles. At the risk of sounding cliché, the most intriguing organ is located between our ears; if I catch a glimpse of that, there’s no saying where things might take us.
What is the meaning of life?
You've got me. I can't say, but I suspect the paint which colors existence involves richness of experience, purpose, and human connection.
Can we speak before meeting?
After much deliberation I’ve decided to delegate and hire an assistant, day-to-day administrative minutiae started to feel like an unproductive use of my time. I’m still around if prescreened individuals would like a response before meeting, just think of Sandi as my trusted gatekeeper! Established friends who would like an audience - just ask for me and I’ll write you back ;)
I’ve never done this before, what should I expect?
Please see my simple instructions for screening without references here. I guess the only thing I would stress is don’t be nervous! Meeting will be no different than a first date, it will involve talking, laughing and getting to know each other (preferably over good food). I usually recommend three hours so that we have time to build trust and become comfortable with the other person. After successful dates I am always more than happy to provide a reference. While on the topic of references...
Will you provide a reference?
If we have met in the past year and you feel it went well please do not hesitate to use me as reference! Simply pass my information along, no need to ask permission first. I love the reference system because I feel it keeps my friends and I the safest. While on the topic of friends…
Do you have friends?
No, unfortunately I’m a social pariah. Kidding, yes, I have a select list of favorites in LA, SF, NYC, and Chicago- just ask!
Can I bring you something?
While gifts are never expected, due to popular demand > wishlist. Also herbal teas, books, dark chocolate, potted plants, musical instruments, anything from Dries van Noten or Anna Sui.
When will you be in my city?
I spend most of my time in California and New York. If you'd like to see me somewhere other than the coasts, fly me to you is a great option. If you'd like to know more about where to find me, prescreen for travel notes :)
“A man can do what he wants, but not want what he wants.” -Schopenhauer
Camus, Murakami, Helprin, A. Carson, M. Nelson, Goethe
three favorite things
Sand dunes, sandwiches, road trips